How Hard Is It to Put on Some Pants?

I've mentioned our next-door neighbor before in this space. She's the one with the barky dogs, bleached hair, cottage cheese thighs (and a propensity for short shorts), inability to make eye contact, and recycling bins overflowing with empty liquor bottles.

Generally, we don't see too much of her. But a couple of weekends back, Steve was making breakfast when I heard him say, with great gravity, "Oh my GOD." I quickly trotted into the kitchen to find him staring out the window at our neighbor, who had gone to the mailboxes with no pants on. She was wearing, as far as we could tell, a quilted jacket and flip flops. That's it. In 20-degree weather. And the quilted jacket was not a long garment.

We took a picture. See for yourself:

Seriously. How hard is it to throw some pants on?

Better Luck Next Time

Today was Day 11 of my medicated cycle, so I went in to get my ovaries and lining checked. I had two great follicles -- on my right ovary. Unfortunately, since I was born without a right fallopian tube (and right side of my uterus), that is not particularly helpful. The left ovary was sitting there quietly all hooked up to my half-uterus, but keeping a low profile, follicle-wise.

The doctor said we could go ahead with the trigger shot this month on the offhand chance that -- get this -- my left fallopian tube swings over and picks up the eggs from the right ovary. (I have heard of women with unicornuate uteruses [UUs] getting pregnant when they knew the unattached ovary was the one producing eggs, so I guess that's how it goes down.) But I decided just to stop the meds for this cycle. I'd rather really go for it when the chances were high.

I'm bummed, but philosophical about the whole thing. I guess that's easy since it was the first real attempt under medical observation. I wonder how far this thing will go before we actually succeed.

My XM Radio Mocks Me

My XM mocks me. It has a memory function that is supposed to let me know whenever a song I like that I've marked with the memory button is playing on another channel -- but mine never worked right. In the beginning, I didn't realize it wasn't working, and I'd hit "memory" whenever a good song came on. Occasionally, I'd also hit memory by mistake when I was trying to change the preset band. One of the times I hit memory by mistake, the song "Everybody Plays the Fool" was on, and I know this because that is the ONLY song that my XM ever reminds me of.

But I haven't given up. Even now, Mr. Mister (for example) will come on and I'll hit the memory button. I mean, I kind of know it's not going to happen. It's an exercise in futility, but I do it anyway. I keep thinking that one of these days, maybe it will fix itself.

I called XM and they said I'd have to reset the entire device, and reenter all my presets, to attempt to fix the problem. Like I have time for that. There's 30 presets.

And so, every so often, "Everybody Plays the Fool" comes on somewhere in the XM universe, and I hear the mild-mannered beep that is my XM taunting me another time.

Here Goes Nothing

Heading to my Day 3 monitoring appointment last week, I was full of angst and almost weepy. I was worried about starting the medicated cycle, afraid of the side effects, and generally dreading starting the whole process of trying to have a baby again. But I felt a lot better after coming out of the appointment. I went in there and noticed several professional women and a few husbands. Nobody was looking at each other or talking, and the women with husbands were looking extra tense. We all have a common bond, but we were sitting there in our private worlds, not sharing. The vibes passing between people are basically, "you're infertile. I'm infertile. And I don't want to talk about it." It's like a bus station full of infertile people.

After an awkward 10 minutes or so, pretending not to look at the other patients, I went back and had blood drawn. Then I was dispatched to a smaller waiting area in the back for an ultrasound, which was just to ensure my ovaries were in good shape. Another woman was sitting back there and we got to talking. She's done at least one IUI and this is her fourth IVF cycle. She went down the litany of her various tests and injections and was completely blase' about it. I felt like a big wimp.

I really hope this is her cycle.

Meanwhile, my fertility specialist suggested acupuncture, saying it seems to improve results, so I've been going and getting needles stuck into my legs and hands. I'll try to take a picture one of these times and post it on the blog. It's pretty wild. It doesn't hurt at all, though, and is actually really relaxing.

So we'll see how this goes. I'm going to try hard not to be scared, or sad, or depressed. I'm going to try to just move forward.

It's really the only thing we can do.