Monday, December 22, 2008

Institutionalized

These walls are kind of funny. First you hate 'em, then you get used to 'em. Enough time passes, gets so you depend on them. That's institutionalized.
-- Shawshank Redemption
I wonder if this is happening to me. I haven't been allowed to leave my room in more than three weeks -- not even for an ultrasound -- and I'm starting to worry about how I'll deal with being out in the world again someday.

It's kind of disturbing.

8 comments:

Rebecca said...

Does your bed have wheels? You should have Steve unlock the brakes and take you down the hallway. Have a race with another patient.

electriclady said...

I was afraid to leave the house after being on bedrest for so long. But you do get over it, and pretty quickly too, I promise!

Mary said...

I would have the same fears...but you'll be okay. Once you have that baby in your arms you will be so engrossed you won't have time to worry.

Caseystay said...

I know some days it seems like you could actually spend 1.5 hours commuting to work and that would be better than the hospital, but it's not. You aren't missing anything except highly stressed-out people who don't really have anything to be stressed about. Take good care of yourself...that's all that's important right now :) Wish I could be there to bring you a milkshake :)

Andrew said...

The car ride home is going to feel wildly fast.

Cami said...

You need to start letting people come visit you!!! Let me know when - I'd love to come by for a bit to chat and distract you with my life's drama...For example. Caroline was brushing her teeth just now and called for me saying the bathroom was getting wet. I got in there and water is spraying from the toilet tank. 2 inches of pee water on the bathroom floor...AND it seeped to the carpet, THROUGH the floor down to the living room. Good times. Pee water is collecting in my mixing bowl while every single one of my towels are drenched in pee. Thank goodness this is a rental.

Let me come and hang with you!!! I'll bring in some diabetic friendly lunch.

sara said...

I used to write to Meredith about this also...it was a HUGE worry of mine. Isn't it funny what you think of when you're in the hospital? I truly think until you've been in your situation (or mine) you don't really think of all those things, you know? You're going to do fine. You will find large crowds both annoying and exhausting for a bit once you get out. The first time I went to Target a couple of days after I got out I was so freakin overwhelmed. I got a headache from all the commotion and noise. Then when I just went to a shower that the work people threw for us - I was exhausted after like an hour of visiting. You just get used to not being around so many people. But now things are fine.

Funny thing was that the hospital I was at had something called "room service" where you call "840" on the room phone for them to bring you what you order off of a limited hospital menu. When I got home I almost wanted to dial the phone for dinner the first night. How sick is that, LOL!! Hang in there girl...and if you're having a down moment over the holiday - give me a ring...I mean it, even if it's late or send a text...I'm here and have no huge plans except hanging out with Brynn and a ton of snow. (Meredith and I texted when I was in the hospital at like 3AM sometime, and with the new baby, I'm always up...((Hugs))

murison said...

A friend of mine long ago took a class (English, or art, or somesuch totally unrelated) whose teacher tortured them with some God-awful piece of "music" at the start of every class. She said that by the end of the semester every student in the class grew to love that song. Methinks you see music in your walls.