Client Work: In Support of Mogwai

I never talk about work on here because I think it's generally a boring topic, and it also seems like a great way to get fired. But I've recently started working on a project that is having some assorted "challenges," and as a result, the team I'm working with has instituted a number of hard-and-fast rules. The team was informed of these rules during an anti-motivational meeting in which the manager's finger pointed at us all numerous times. (Thankfully, it was quite uncharacteristic of my experiences to date in this particular career.)

I don't remember all the rules verbatim, but I'll try to give you an idea of them here.

• This task and no other must be a priority
• Do not announce yourself on conference calls
• Do not allow too many of your team members to attend the same meeting
• The client may joke around with you, but you do NOT joke around with the client
  
• Keep it out of bright light
• Never get it wet
• Never, ever, ever feed it after midnight